Ungratefully Yours

I’m back. No shortage of things to write about but I confess the news cycle is numbing.

On Jan 20^th Prime Minister Mark Carney gave an applauded speech at the Davos World Economic Forum. Perhaps an exercise in tautology he posited, “we live in an era of great power rivalry…the rules-based order is fading…Let me be direct. We are in the midst of a rupture, not a transition...More recently, great powers have begun using economic integration as weapons, tariffs as leverage, financial infrastructure as coercion, and supply chains as vulnerabilities to be exploited.” While Carney never singled out President Donald Trump by name as the object of his concern there was no mistaking that Carney’s speech was more than a little jab in Trumps’s direction. A day later Donald Trump spoke in his ususal rambling, threatening boorish manner. And in a direct charge aimed at Prime Minister Carney he accused him of being ungrateful to the United States. Why? Because Canada not only gets a lot of freebies from the United States, but they could not exist without the United States. Canada should show some gratitude. Walrus columnist, Wesley Wark writes “Canada was Zelenskyyed.”

Alas in the ensuing days much has been written about the two speeches, but what caught my attention was the word “(un)grateful.”

Of course, Canada was not the only focus of Trump’s accusations of ungratefulness, In Trump’s mind NATO, Denmark, Finland and the world for that matter are all ungrateful for the leadership of Donald Trump. Holding back my sorrow for Trump I thought it might be helpful to dive into the concept of gratitude and its reciprocal relationship with the word “gift. “

My dictionary defines the noun “gratitude” as an emotion and a state of appreciation for the positive things in life. It involves recognizing the goodness we experience and acknowledging that it comes from sources outside ourselves, fostering a sense of thankfulness.

In the Bible gratitude means "extending favor towards" or giving grace and kindness as a response.

Conversely “Ungrateful “is an adjective used to criticize someone for not showing thanks or for being unkind to someone who has helped them or done them an unsolicited favor or gift.

Before delving into the geopolitical question framing my inquiry, I wonder if it is possible to accuse someone of being ungrateful without revealing one’s own ungratefulness.  A typical scenario goes like this: Person “B” receives a gift for which the giver, Person A at some point expects/anticipates a return and should it not come eventually Person B often fosters their own ungratefulness thereby nullifying the original gift.^[1] In fact "Giving" suffers the same paradoxical dilemma as does the vice of pride and the virtue of humility. The moment you think you have conquered your pride, you have been defeated. And the moment you praise your humility you expose your pride.

For, this reason, the late notable postmodern philosopher Jacques Derrida argued that “pure” gift giving is an impossible action. In time even with the best motives gift giving cannot escape the obligations of an economic exchange. Concludes Derrida, if A gives to B, B is now indebted in some way to A. The debt may not be a legal transaction and the giver may say they do not want anything in return but should the receiver of the gift fail to reciprocate the gift in any way, through a note, a lending hand, or a gift in return,  an equilibrium will be upended and should it not be restored the “generous” gift can result in a feeling of ingratitude on the part of the giver.

Last Fall I was sure to cash in my free Starbucks beverage on my birthday.  Every year I try to buy a drink in excess of $10. Even with a few extra expresso’s I again fell short by a few cents. With my free beverage in hand, I then told the baristas in the drive through window, I am grateful to have another year in relatively good health, I would like to pay if forward and bless the stranger in the car behind me and pay for their drink – an anonymous gift if you will. Unfortunately, I think the driver was also trying to exceed 10$ on their purchase.

In my Starbucks encounter it could be that giving anonymously is a “pure” kind of gift giving. I did not stay around to see the reaction of the stranger. But even here Derrida would pause and say not so fast. I left the recipient wondering should they too pay it forward.  What did they do to receive this gift? And the giver in this case, myself, may be tempted to think higher of himself with his own self-congratulation. Of course, my10$ gift is hardly the kind of thing that will change lives and it really did not cost me anything as I simply passed along my free coffee to the person behind me. It was a zero-sum game. If anything, I owe my gratitude to the Starbuck company for giving me the birthday deal, but at the cost of Starbuck coffee maybe they should be grateful that I pay so much for their coffee.

Giving and its companion “gratefulness” are complicated. It should, however, be noted despite his cautions Derrida concludes that giving is still an important and essential activity. The world would be a poorer place if everyone acted only for getting something in return. Giving as an economical pure act of grace may be impossible but could we as a human species survive without trying. We cannot do everything for a reward. Hopefully there are some things we do just for the love of them.

At the Geopolitical level gift giving becomes even more complicated. As a Canadian I am grateful that my Province builds roads, hospitals, exchanges goods for food and endeavors to keeps its citizens safe. I know in a sense I pay for these services through taxes but there is no requirement that my government would do these things. And here the law of reciprocal return enters because if our government does not live up to our expectations, we vote out the government for another party

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As I slide back to my original concern, in Donald Trump’s^[2] mind the United States has for too long paid for everyone else’s dinner at the table and it is now time for others to pay up.^[3] He has gone so far to say he does not need anyone else. The USA is august all by itself.

The reality is that in a global world of a single place we all receive benefits from each other both in preventative and affirming ways. Climate Change is a problem for all and cannot be corrected by any one single player. It requires the contribution of everyone. Should a country decide not to participate, that country owes a debt to those countries trying to hold back the effects of climate change. Likewise, disease, and famine is a global problem, and vaccinations are a world-wide attempt to minimize the dangerous effects of disease both home and abroad. Countries that do not participate demonstrate their ungratefulness to underprivileged nations that are perhaps not in the same position to avail themselves of the needed medications. And as we all know disease knows no borders.  

Global gratitude is a zero-sum game. We are all in debt to each other. It behooves wealthy countries to assist poorer ones. No one can go alone. Trump is fond of saying America needs no one – He has all the leverage. That is Trump at his own ungrateful best. 

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^[1] In politics because of the law of return by rule of law politicians are generally prohibited from receiving extravagant gifts from other leaders or donors. Something is expected in return. One leader receives a gift from another leader and expects a lower tariff, a “deal” or some other compensation.

^[2] I use Trump’s name here rather than United States, because in my recent journeys into the States, I cannot count the number of people who have apologized for the actions of Donald Trump.

^[3] Of course, Trump has not personally paid for anyone and has personally benefited from his position as President. By his own admission Trump does not hide the fact that he thinks of himself as a deal maker, not a gift giver.  And ironically his overture to the evangelical Christian culture is in the form of a deal for votes and significant segments of that evangelical culture use Trump for their own wish list of reciprocal benefits. Ironic because Christianity’s foundation is said to be based on an unmerited gift.